Strong experiences bind people and there's a limited pool of those. Friends and lovers promise each other binding opportunities. This is why ppl avoid promiscuity: "he/she'll never bind to me over what he/she made trivial". Important binding coin spent.
This is why if your partner sets up something, try to have as much fun as you can. Don't just tag along, embrace it and milk it for all that it's got. That's your part of the deal: you're to spend your limited capability to be emotionally affected together.
Also why men are often interested in more life-naive girls. More to impress them with! If you want to dance, you have to make space for your partner's moves. For a trade, you need to lack something they can provide. Trad roles had accounted for this, for all their unfairness.
Some will say it's not your job to be impressed or lacking, partner needs to up their game. Sure, if you don't need the romance itself. Some people will try but with each attempt less will impress you, and you will thus be less love-responsive, evoking less love, not just loving less. This well will dry out.
To care about you strongly, your partner needs to love you, and love grows from things working out. You cannot fake things working out. You have a limited capacity for easily accessible love fuel. Your job is to cultivate the feelings you believe in. Therefore choose who to spend fun times with wisely, for you will love them more, and they might love you more in turn.
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